A Story From The Heart

Nope. It’s not tears of joy tonight. Thought I could control it but not everything is in our favour innit?  That really hurts but I controlled my emotions to show how unacceptable it was. Who can even be this sane and calm. Is this even normal? Idk.  “The softness, The sweetness…”  As usual. I wished I was missed more than that. And as usual, I kill my own sanity with expectations. GG nadhoossh.  P/s: note to self. You are worth more than that and you deserve better. Ily. 

“I takleh tidoq”  Wish I could say that. Jari ni tahan ja nak cakap. But I’m not allowed to anymore. It’s messing with my head again luv. The overthinking, the gloomy feeling, the urge to shut everyone again. Can’t you hold me and tell me it’ll be alright?  No. Habits. It’s not easy to stop old habits right luv.  *flashbacks*  I’ll try to sleep. Nunyteee 🥺